Are You Really Free?
Greetings Lighthouse members,
What an amazing day in the Lord that He has blessed us with. Today I want to pose a simple question to the majority: Are you really free?
I ask this because I recently asked myself this question and discovered the answer was: No, not entirely. We must be open and honest with ourselves, and with God. I have had many deliverance and exorcism sessions in the last 5 years but did not know I still had deep wounds and deep places that demons enjoyed their secrecy.
How do you know if you’re holding on to an offense or harboring a hidden piece of unforgiveness in your heart? True forgiveness comes when you completely forget about the situation and what the people did. True forgiveness comes when you can talk about it and it doesn’t bother you – where you can actually bless that person and open your heart to be hurt again (this time trusting in Jesus to heal you if it gets wounded).
Many of us (including myself) have said yes, we could do this, but when the trial and test comes our way; we have failed. Despite my best efforts and what I know, I could not achieve true forgiveness. The reason why (in my case) is that I was harboring grudges from childhood – completely unrelated situations with completely different people altogether. The issue was not what the person did to me, or what it was all about, but rather these emotions and thoughts are all tied in together in a vast network within the soul.
Parts of me that were 5 years old were offended and never had a chance to speak. Parts of me were 15 years old that were angry at injustice and never got ministered to. So when trials came at 32 years old, despite knowing better and having Jesus – I failed the test because I reacted out of the wound of the 5 year-old.
The real truth is, I allowed those fragments to remain in me because (unknowingly) I was comfortable with how they surfaced to handle my pain and my problems. It was convenient for me. I discovered this only after a long dialogue with God, allowing Him to reveal truth to me at all cost, even if it was hurtful for a moment. I am glad I paid that price and injured my pride to receive truth that could set me free.
I came before the team and asked them to please perform a deliverance on me because I am in desperate need. Without hesitation, the team sought God and cast out many demons behind these wounded soul fragments and I have to stress the importance that a large part of this had to do with my will. Once you acknowledge the truth and commit to it – you have to stand up and fight. You have to be willing to change lifestyles and mindsets and live differently.
I realized the challenge was not admitting I had a problem or even getting it dealt with. The real problem lay in the truth that I now had to man up and face my pain and deal with it once and for all – the right way. No alters, no personalities, no demons. The real Brett had to look in a real mirror and face the real truth. This was the most powerful deliverance I have ever had. Two and a half hours of bitter weeping and painful reflection on how a lot of my problems originated with my own choices.
When you make yourself responsible and accountable for how your life is and you receive the truth as God gives it, He is right there to help you rise up and overcome those challenges. It is never easy to swallow a hard pill, but this is the best measure of freedom that God desires to give all of us. I didn’t always have an open heart to God, it took a lot of work on God’s part (and God’s grace) to get where I am today. I am here to encourage those who are in bondage, those who seem to be stuck, those who are oppressed by generational strongholds – there is hope. God has a plan for you and in His perfect timing you will arise and overcome every battle and every enemy will be defeated on your behalf. Only do not give up and keep pressing forward.
God desires to set you totally free. God wants you to have peace and walk in freedom – and it is a process, it is as though you are an onion and God is peeling each layer, one at a time, bringing you closer to Him each time. Remember God will not give us more than we can bear, and He will allow us to learn how to walk in and live in the freedom He gives us before stripping the next layer and revealing the darkness there.
Please be encouraged to continue to cry out to God for freedom and deliverance. Even when it seems like all is lost, God is always doing something deeper, something new and something unexpected. Even if you are a seasoned veteran, there is always something God can show you. Our Father loves to heal, loves to mend and restore. Let us all give God some time each day to just sit in His presence and allow Him to do as He desires.
Blessings in Christ,
Rev. Brett Connell
Lighthouse Inc. Church Deliverance Team